Grief Motif
Or A Few Ways to Turn Your Professional Failure Into Fuel for Your Fire
It was March 12, 2018. One of the worst days of my life. I just got laid off from the job I loved the most. It was devastating.
I was riding high on a bunch of accomplishments. I had just won a company award for being the best writer on my team. I won a national award for my campaign work for a supplement brand. I had heard of some rumblings about the company not making goals but when I heard over the weekend layoffs were coming, I felt nervous but I didn’t think it would come for me. But it did.
I spent years grieving that loss, because that job had everything I wanted. Comraderie within my department. A place to put my creativity. A growing love for brand storytelling.
For as devasting as it was, I was able to take that growing love of storytelling and was able to funnel it into growing who I was. The jobs I took from then until I started Chapters Creative didn’t fill the professional void, but from March 2018-January 2022, this is how I was able to take my grief and turn it into something that would help me grow.
1. Stay Curious
By no means am I saying your career should be the only thing that gives you meaning. But if there was something about your job that you really enjoyed and was looking forward to learning more about it, keep learning about it. Don’t let the only reason why you were interested in it be that you were getting to be interested.
Find experts on LinkedIn. YouTube and Google are your friends. Your continued education about the shit you enjoyed will help you when you go looking for your new full-time gig or maybe even start your own business.
2. Find Your Long-Term Why
For a long time after I got laid off, I was fueled mostly by the chip on my shoulder that developed.
“Lay me off? I’ll show you.”
“Didn’t believe in me? F*** you. I don’t need you. I’ll prove you wrong.”
While turning spite into professional/personal success can work, but it’s a short-term reason with diminishing returns. Piss and vinegar eventually have diminishing returns. Once I realized that I was able to help people simplify their business ideas and bring their brands to life in a meaningful way, the less the chip on my shoulder had power. It became much more inspiring to help people versus self-soothe my anger through “success.”
Find your reason why your skills and experiences of who you are can help someone. Positive feedback and knowing you’re making a difference in someone else’s life will give you far more mileage than negativity.
3. Stay Sane
Oh, did I mention I got fired from a job during the pandemic when my mental health took a dive? It had taken a few months for me to find employment, but in between job interviews, I made sure I did things that helped me blow off steam. I spent a lot of time during the summer of 2020 taking long walks through my Tennessee neighborhood and writing/recording songs.
If all I did were sit and stew over what went wrong and focus completely on a job search, I would’ve burned out quickly.
4. Find Your People
It’s when I get the most insular, the worse things get. When I started Chapters Creative, I started it on a whim. I read a few books to help me, but I never felt as supported when I found a few friends who knew more than me to help guide me with the transition from the 9-5 world to doing my own thing. And even if you don’t want to go into business for yourself and want to stay in your 9-5, there are probably aspects of your job search (interviewing, resume/portfolio building) you probably need some pointers with.
Find your people who’ve been there before and know more than you. You’re not going to know everything, and you likely never will!
I’ve done a lot of brand building in the past 2 1/2 years, and I’ve always found it best when I can extract someone’s story and incorporate their uniqueness into their new brand/business idea.
If you have a business idea but need help simplifying and focusing it into a brand, website, and/or content, I have 10+ years of experience. I’m confident I can help you.